TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America ..
MARIA : Here it is.
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS : Maria.
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TEACHER : John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile'?
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
GLENN : Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE : Me!
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TEACHER : Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I'.
MILLIE : I is...
TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am'.
MILLIE : All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER : George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS : Because George still had the axe in his hand.
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TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER : Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog.
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TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no
longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher
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